Christmas Memories

I love this time of the year! I let the season of Christmas wash over and envelope me while I dive into preparations. I tend to reflect on Christmases past while I'm listening to Christmas music, signing Christmas cards, wrapping gifts and baking cookies.

Christmas was always a very busy time for my family, and I can see how my parents would become a bit stressed out during this time of year. When I was very young, we had four or five Christmas parties to attend over the course of two days. On Christmas Eve, we would all bundle up and drive out to my Aunt's house for my Dad's family's Christmas Party. This was one of the times during the year where all of the Aunts, Uncles and cousins (all 9 of us) would get together all at once to visit. There was a gift exchange and a TON of food. All of us cousins would have their own stocking, which was oversized and stuffed full. (For some reason...we always received underwear in there along with our little toys and games!) We would have lunch there, then open presents. When it got to be around dinner time, we would bundle up again and head to the Bieler Family party (my mom's mom's family). This party would be held at different houses each year. This was another big party. All of my Great-Aunts & Uncles and cousins would gather to celebrate the season with my Great-Grandpa. Great-Grandpa Bieler was a stout, round German with a huge heart. He LOVED Christmas. I think I must inherit that trait from him! He would have so many presents for us kids that it would put Santa Claus to shame! We would party well into the night...until around 10pm or so, when my family would once again bundle up and drive to church for our Christmas Eve service.

The Christmas Eve service was always the most beautiful service in my mind when I was a child. The entire church would be decorated for the season - there would be wreaths on the doors and on the walls, greenery was draped everywhere, the giant Christmas tree would be at the front of the church, red and pink poinsettias would surround the alter and pulpit, and the beautiful nativity scene would be surrounded by about 100 candles. It was breathtaking! At the end of the service, the entire congregation would hold lit candles and sing "Silent Night" with all of the electric lights switched off. I would stare at the nativity scene and hold my candle as we sang, pretending that I was really there at the stable, witnessing the newborn Jesus.

After church, we would drive home. By this time, it was nearing midnight. My brother and I would look out for Rudolph's red nose in the sky. I found out at a very early age that Santa was a myth (that's a story for another time), but I kept up appearances for my brother. I would point out a distant glowing red light (which was in actuality a light atop a radio tower) and tell him that it was Rudolph.

Once we got home, we were allowed to open one present. That present would always be new pyjamas. Always. Mom wanted us to have fresh, nice, new PJs for Christmas morning pictures!

The next morning, we would awaken to Christmas music playing from the stereo in the living room. That was the signal that it was ok to come out of our rooms for Christmas. The Christmast tree would be all aglow and wrapped presents would be spilling out from under the tree. Stockings were first...my brother and I would pull out trinket after trinket...ending with the traditional orange in the toe of the stocking. Mom would have homemade Swedish Tea Ring with butter for breakfast. She and dad would sip their coffee and munch on the tea ring while my brother and I took turns opening presents. I would annoy my brother by taking my time unwrapping my gifts. No tearing through the wrappings like an animal for me! I would meticulously open the paper wrappings where they were taped!

After our presents were all opened, we would get cleaned up and dressed for the rest of the day. (At one time, our church had Christmas Day services too, so we would go there first, but after awhile, they stopped having them and just had the Christmas Eve services.) We would bundle up again and head over to my grandparents' (my mom's parents') house for Christmas. There would be more presents and my grandma would cook us a wonderful Christmas lunch. That evening, we'd all head over to the Sells' Family Christmas Party. This was my mom's dad's family. Again...this party was packed full of family that I would most often only see once a year at Christmas. It was fun though! Much like the Bieler party on Christmas Eve, it was as if you stepped back in time. The women would be in Christmas dresses with glittery broaches pinned on. All the adults would have a ciggarette in one hand and a glass of "Christmas Spirits" in the other. It was as if it were the 1950's again. My great-aunts wore bright red lipstick that would transfer to their ciggaretts and glasses. My great-uncles would be wearing black trousers and shiney black shoes with their jacket & ties or, if it was my Uncle Dick, his cardigan sweater. I remember these days looking up at them all, hearing the laughter and fun and loving the fact that I was related to these amazing people.

Yes, Christmas parties kept us always on the go. I loved it, but it was a bit much for my parents, I think. The rush of the holidays was always something they did not enjoy. So, one tradition that my parents started was that one night before Christmas, we would switch off the tv and all the lights, candles would be lit along with the tree, and we would listen to Christmas records (yes, there were no CDs or MP3s back then!) on the stereo and munch on summer sausage and crackers with a variety of cheeses, while we slowed everything down and enjoyed the evening.

Another tradition was baking cookies. My Grandma Ethel would make these AMAZING sugar cookies. They were so thin and crisp...absolutely delicious. When I was 8 years old, Grandma passed away. So mom took over the tradition of making these delicate little cookies. The fun thing for my brother and I was that we were the ones who would help decorate them. We would "paint" the color with egg yolk mixed with food coloring onto the unbaked cookies, then the color would become baked on. Well, the problem was that mom would get very frustrated while making these cookies. They had to be rolled out veeeeeerrrrryyyyy thinly and then cut out. Not easy to do with two kids running around. So, my brother and I would be banished to our rooms to play while mom prepared the cookies for us to paint while listening to Christmas music (which I think made her refrain from cursing!). She would call us out when they were ready to be painted!

As an adult, I have tried to incorporate some of the traditions of my youth. It's not always easy, but even if I am unable to re-create some of them...I will always be able to replay them in my memories!

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas, ev'rywhere you go. There's a tree in the Grand Hotel, one in the park as well, the sturdy kind that doesn't mind the snow. It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...soon the bells will start, and the thing that will make them ring is the carol that you sing, right within your heart!

Reflections of Thanksgiving

It's late November in the Midwest. There's a chill in the air and you can't walk without crunching the fallen leaves under your feet. At this point of the year, most of the trees are bare. Only a few are still holding onto their leaves, and those will be gone as well before much longer. A forecast of rain will most likely wash the leaves from their branches. Pumpkins and brightly colored indian corn decorate many homes. Candles glow from windows now that the evening creeps upon us earlier.

Next week is Thanksgiving. The holiday season is upon us! Christmas decorations have been in stores for a few weeks now, as have holiday sale advertisements on television. It's time to start writing lists and coming up with a gameplan for the next month and a half. Parties to plan, goodies to bake, gifts to shop for. It can be both exciting and overwhelming!

One thing that I like to do this time of year is to reflect and remember how I spent the holidays as a child. This year, I will try to post some reflections of the past here on this blog as a way of reminiscing about days gone by. Today, I will talk about Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving has always been the "start" of the holiday season for me. Growing up, it was the first in a series of celebrations lasting through New Year's Day. When I was very young, I would help my Grandma Ethel in the kitchen. Well, I didn't really help her, but she made me think that I did. Each year, she would make a giant turkey. After she washed it and prepared it for the roasting pan, I would pat it and give it a kiss. Yep. I would kiss a raw turkey. I can imagine many people squirming at that notion, but I assure you...I never had a case of salmonella or anything else due to my kissing the cold, pimply turkey skin!

After my Grandma Ethel passed away, we would have Thanksgiving at my dad's parents' house. Grandma would fix a big turkey in an electric roaster. She would have the meal laid out as in a buffet style because there were so many of us (4 sets of aunts and uncles and 9 grandkids. We would have mashed potatoes and green bean casserole. She would fix dressing...but it was always too mushy and runny. You always wanted to be one of the first to go through the line so that you could spoon out some dressing from along the edges, because that was where it was drier! Grandma would almost always burn the rolls, too. What with so many people running around the kitchen, that's hardly a surprise! The turkey gravy...well, in my opionion...really wasn't gravy. It was more like broth with chunks of turkey meat in it. It was clear and liquidy...not thick and creamy. So you'd load up your plate and splash a little gravy/broth over your mashed potatoes and turkey...because the turkey - especially the white meat - was usually a bit dry (unlike the dressing). If you had any room in your stomach after you ate lunch, the desserts would be calling your name. My aunt would make a chocolate eclair dessert (to die for). Grandma would have a variety of pies: pumpkin, pecan, peanut butter...and maybe an angelfood cake. The whole clan would stuff themselves silly! The grown-ups would linger at the table, sipping their coffee and chatting. My Uncle Alan would tackle washing the dishes. Us kids would run around (I'm not sure where we got all that energy) and play in the playroom or, if it was warm enough, outdoors. The men would make their way into the living room to watch football. The women sat at the table and would play euchre or some other game.

Usually, the next day (Friday), mom would make "our" Thanksgiving meal. Grandpa Ralph would come over to join us (he would normally go to his sister's the day before), and he would always bring a bottle of homemade wine. Mom would make a turkey, mashed potatoes, REAL gravy (not the broth stuff), dressing (that wasn't runny!), sweet potatoes, rolls, and homemade cranberry salad. For me and my brother, she would open up a can of jellied cranberry sauce, since we didnt' care for the homemade stuff. We would all sit around our big dining table, which was draped in a nice tablecloth. As a kid, I would have a tiny glass of wine...much smaller than the adults. One year, I remember, Grandpa had made a cranberry wine. Now that was delicious! I have never had a wine as good as the homemade wine Grandpa would make.

Throughout my childhood, Thanksgiving was typically the same, year after year. One year, however, we had a bad snowstorm. Instead of making the trek to my grandparents' house, which was about a 30 minute drive in good weather, my parents bundled my brother and I up and we went to their house the night before. I remember waking up to the smell of Grandma's turkey roasting in the oven. Looking out the window, there was a crisp and clean blanket of snow covering everything. It was magical. My cousins came over soon after, since they lived on the same block. That year, we got to spend extra time together playing, having fun, and eating lots of turkey!

I am thankful for those memories of Thanksgivings past. This year, I plan on making memories for my own family, including my brother-in-law and my nephews and niece. Perhaps in 20 years, they'll look back on this Thanksgiving and smile, just as I do with my own Thanksgiving memories.

"Oh the Lord's been good to me, and so I thank the Lord, for giving me the things I need: the sun and the rain and the appleseeds. The Lord's been good to me! " ~ John "Johnny Appleseed" Chapman

"How Can You Mend a Broken Heart?"

Today we got the sad news that Tony Huesman passed away this Sunday at the age of 51.

Tony was an inspiration to many here in the Dayton area. He had been diagnosed with viral cardiomyopathy while in high school. Then, on August 30, 1978, at the age of 20, Tony underwent a heart transplant at Stanford University. The doctors then told him that his new heart would probably only last 5 or 10 years. Tony’s donated heart proved them wrong. At almost 31 years later, it stopped due to a progression of melanoma, a form of skin cancer. Tony held the world record for living with the same transplanted heart for the longest amount of time in medical history.

Sure, holding a world record is pretty cool and all, but Tony didn’t stop there. He wrote three children’s books – Heart Smart, There Are Some Things More Important Than Baseball, and His Only Hope – in order to teach children about heart health. He founded the Huesman Heart Foundation, which provides heart healthy education programs in elementary schools and sponsors Healthy Heart Days at elementary schools around the Dayton area.

In late August 1979, an unknown person gave their heart to Tony. Tony spent the rest of his life giving back to others. That is a lifestyle we should all take to “heart”.


"It doesn't really matter when we die, how we die or why we die. What really does matter is how we live...and the hearts and souls of those we touch along the way." ~ Tony Huesman

"Smile...though your heart is aching..."

Since the afternoon of June 25th, there has been much press and spectacle concerning the death of Michael Jackson. Fans around the globe have mourned this pop star, some to the extent that you would’ve thought ol’ MJ was a saint or at least a head-of-state. There was tons of speculation as to when and where his funeral would be? Would it be open to the public? Would it he be laid to rest at his Neverland Ranch, much like Elvis Presley was at Graceland? Would there be a public viewing?

Of course there were those grousing about, muttering for anyone to hear of their distain for any such hero-worship of “Wacko Jacko” given his much publicized court hearings for alleged child molestation, the strange way he hid his children behind masks or veils when they were out in public, and his obvious physical changes over the years.

It all came to a head yesterday, July 7th, which ironically was seven years to the day that Michael Jackson signed his will designating his mother as caretaker of his children.

When I first heard that the City of Los Angeles had shut down traffic between Forest Lawn and the Staples Center …I was floored. Having lived out in Los Angeles and experiencing the “lovely” traffic for 3 years, I couldn’t believe it. I also couldn’t believe that they were footing the bill for the huge memorial “service”…which sounded like it would be more like a “show” than a “service”.

I was at work, but I tuned in via the internet. I listened to the heartfelt eulogies. I heard the songs sung in remembrance. I was a little amazed that Michael Jackson’s favorite song was the same as my own…and when his brother, Jermaine, sang it – straight from his heart for his little brother who had gone away – it hit me. When, later, his brothers spoke, and then when his little girl, Paris, put it so plain and simple, as only a child can – it hit me.

Yeah, Michael Jackson…the über-famous King of Pop, love him or hate him…had died. But that wasn’t what hit me. It was not the fact that he was a famous celebrity who had fans crying all over the world, sad because they would not be able to see him or hear new songs from him again. It was not the press coverage. It was not the pomp. It was simply this…that three children had lost their daddy. A mother and father had lost a son. Siblings had lost a brother. Michael Jackson was more than an icon. He was a daddy. He was a son. He was a brother. A cousin. A nephew. A friend. We all have people in our lives that we would be devastated to lose. The Jackson family lost one of theirs. A piece of them is gone forever - and it hurts them. And knowing that hurt, my heart and my prayers go out to them.

Time will help their hearts to heal. They’ll never forget him, but there will be a day when instead of tears, there will be smiles and laughter as they remember him fondly and with love. In that, he will continue to live in their hearts.

“Thank Heaven! The crisis --The danger, is past, and the lingering illness, is over at last --, and the fever called ‘Living’ is conquered at last.” – Edgar Allan Poe

"Friends are friends forever..."

Back when I was in high school, I remember at graduation our choir singing "Friends", a song written and recorded by Michael W. Smith. It was a perfect graduation song...in that it talks about "a chapter in your life is through", etc. We were all teary-eyed because our carefree days of high school were over, our friends that we hung out with on an almost daily basis would be scattering to various colleges, and we weren't sure when or if we would ever see them again. Still we held on tight to the chorus that says, "...friends are friends forever, if the Lord's the lord of them...and a friend will not say never, for the welcome will not end. Though it's hard to let you go, in the Father's hands we know that a lifetime's not too long to live as friends".

(Yeah, it's a Contemporary Christian song...and if we were graduating now instead of 20+ years ago, we probably wouldn't have been allowed to sing it, since we attended a public high school that has since banished any/all things remotely considered "religious"...but that's a rant for another time.)

Sure enough...our friends scattered like the seeds of a dandelion in the breeze. Some ended up in different states, some in different countries. Our once large circle of pals shrunk down to a small handful that we were lucky enough to stay in touch with. I had only two constants from my high school days: Amy & Heather.

Amy & I have been friends since the 5th grade. In high school, our paths crossed in & out via drama club, but for the most part, we hung out with different people. After graduating, we both attended college, took an occasional gen-ed class together, skipped class in favor of french toast for breakfast in the cafeteria, skipped another class in favor for a road trip to a bookstore, worked together on campus, and even carpooled together on occasion. After college, we stayed in touch. Even today, we still get together as often as we can, at least once every month or two, and we talk almost daily via email. We share an obsession with books, Peter Gabriel (we've been to 4 concerts of his together), and greek food.

Heather & I have been friends since I was a sophomore in high school & she was a year behind me as a freshman. We were both very active in drama club & hung out with the same crowd for the most part. I graduated from high school & went to college...she graduated the following year and started working for a law firm where a cousin of mine worked. She was my birthing coach when I had my daughter, I was there for her during her mother's illness and passing, we were honor attendants at each others weddings, I'm "Aunt Amy" to her kids, and she's "Aunt Heather" to my daughter. Today we are as close, if not closer, than ever. We talk on the phone several times a week, get together as much as humanly possible, and email or text message often. She knows me better than anyone on the planet.

These two women are incredibly important to me. I love them both dearly & I thank God often that they're in my life. But...over the years, I've missed my old friends from high school and college. The ones that slipped away. We didn't have email or text messages when we were graduating. It's so much easier for kids today to keep in touch.

Then...Facebook happened.

At first...Facebook confused the life out of me. I heard about how amazing it was from a couple "younger" folks who were in college. Since I was back in college again, I joined...and had 2 friends...one of which was my daughter. I didn't understand it at all. A few years later, Facebook evolved & I went back to it...and found a friend I hadn't talked to in years! I was thrilled! Then, I found another friend. And another! And another! Now I have gotten back in touch with the majority of people whom I was friends with both in high school and in college. Seeing their pictures 20 years after high school is strange. Some have graying hair, many are married and have children, and some are divorced. One is a doctor, one is an Anglican priest, another drives racecars. They've all taken different roads after graduating from high school all those years ago...and all of their roads have converged once again on Facebook.

A couple weeks ago, I ran into a friend of mine whom I was reconnected with via Facebook. We hugged, started chatting...and it was like time hadn't passed. That friendship and love was still there and still strong.

So I guess it wasn't just a silly sentiment we sang at graduation. Friends really can be friends forever!

"Those truly linked don't need correspondence. When they meet again after many years apart, their friendship is as true as ever." ~ Deng Ming-Dao

"Do you remember the time..."

What a weird week. In the space of three days, we lost three well-known celebrities.

When I was a kid growing up in the 1970s & the 1980's, all three of these people were larger than life. I remember seeing Ed McMahon on "The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson"...that is, the few times that I stayed up late enough to watch it. He was the "second banana" to Carson, but a funny man in his own right. Later, we'd go on to watch him with his pal Dick Clark in "TV's Blooper's & Practical Jokes". I always loved to watch that show...to see all the out-takes of the various television shows of the time...and the practical jokes...that was way before Ashton Kutcher had his "Punk'd" show.

In elementary school, Farrah Fawcett was everywhere. All the boys, who had newly discovered that girls ‘weren't so bad’ tacked up copies of her famous swimsuit poster. We girls were ga-ga for her thick blonde hair...and we all got our hair "feathered" like hers.

And Michael Jackson. In 1983, I don't think I knew anyone who didn't have a copy of his "Thriller" album. I remember getting mine for Christmas. My cousin, Tom, got one too. We were thrilled, pardon the pun. We listened to him sing with his brothers in the '70's as "The Jackson Five" and even watched their cartoon with the same name. I wouldn't call myself a huge MJ fan, but I do like some of his music. He got a bit…eccentric…since the 1990’s, and I’m sure that he had a multitude of emotional and/or psychological problems, but you can’t deny the man was an artist.

Despite whether or not I was a big fan of any or all of these celebrities, they've all left their mark indelibly upon pop culture history. They’ll be missed by their friends, family, and friends…but their legacies will live on … on video, in photos, and in music...as well as in the hearts of those they left behind.

“He who has gone, so we but cherish his memory, abides with us, more potent, nay, more present than the living man.” ~Antoine de Saint-Exupery

"I'll have mine with lettuce and tomato..."

Well, next Sunday (June 21) marks the Summer Solstice, and hence, the first official day of the summer season.

Summer has never been my favorite time of the year. I don’t particularly like to be hot. Nor do I enjoy the sauna-type humidity that one experiences here in the Ohio Valley during the summer months. I’m not a big fan of swimming pools...the smell of chlorine and coconut suntan lotion (or coconut anything) makes me queasy. Amusement parks do not amuse me, and roller coasters make me nauseous.

Not much to look forward to…except for one thing.

Summer FOOD. Summer food is amazing. Here are a few highlights of summer eating, in my opinion:

GRILLING
I could kiss the caveman who invented the concept of “grilling”. Hot dogs, hamburgers, chicken, ribs, veggies, fish…it’s ALL GOOD. So is grilled pizza. If you haven’t tried it…do. I prefer the lighter end of grilling. It’s much healthier than frying, plus in the oppressive heat of summer, eating light is always a good thing. Grilling out over some charcoal is divine, or if you can’t use charcoal…propane is a decent back-up. Grill up some juicy burgers… grab a flank steak & sprinkle some seasoning or rub on it before tossing it over the coals…spear some veggies & grill some kebabs…it’s all good!

FRESH PRODUCE
Be it from your backyard garden, your local farmer’s market, or roadside stand, fresh produce is at its peak in the summer months. There’s nothing better than the crunch of biting into some sweet corn straight off the cob, slathered in butter & a dash of salt…or slicing into that bright red, juicy tomato while assembling your sandwich…or sinking your teeth into a fresh peach, strawberry, plum...whatever your favorite fruit may be. These fruits and veggies taste & smell better than anything that was trucked across the country (or the world), plus they’re chock full of nutrients, so buy local & buy often while they’re still around!

SUMMER FESTIVALS
Here in the Miami Valley, summer starts with the Strawberry Festival & ends with the Greek Festival. Festivals & fairs can be a good way to try new foods & see things you might not have seen before. There seems to be a festival for just about everything, so there’s something out there that’s sure to please just about everyone. Some of my favorite things:

* Cotton Candy (from anywhere) – takes me back to when I was a kid at the Brookville Community Picnic. I would watch them take the paper cone & form a giant cloud of pink around it. Love it!

* Apple Butter (Apple Festival at Aullwood Farm in Vandalia, OH) – they make this stuff in huge kettles over an open fire. They can it right there. You’ve never had apple butter until you’ve had it made like that!

* Gyros (Greek Festival in Dayton, OH) – Oh my…the Greek Fest. Probably my all-time favorite festival in Dayton. The church does it right & they’ve got it all down to a science. Their “Gyros Express” line is the best & fastest way to get one.

* Loukoumades (Honey Puffs) (Greek Festival in Dayton, OH) – another one from the Greek Fest. These little puffs of goodness are drizzled with honey & sprinkled with cinnamon. Absolutely delicious!

PICNICS & GET-TOGETHERS
Ok, so I really do not like eating outdoors…especially with all the bugs flying or crawling around. BUT…when the weather is perfect in the early, early summer and there aren’t as many creepy-crawlies around…it’s so nice to eat al fresco. Summer is the family reunion/picnic/get-together season. Kids are off school & it’s warm enough to spill out into the yard, rather than be cramped up inside someone’s house. When I was a kid, we’d have 9 kids running around during our family get-togethers. The men would fire up the grill and the ladies would get all the salads, chips, dips, veggies, etc all set. Occasionally, Grandpa would be just inside the garage, churning some homemade ice cream. THOSE were the days! Why not keep the tradition alive & have your own family get-together this summer? Give your kids some good memories.

So…although I might be cloistered indoors with the air conditioning on this summer, avoiding pools and amusement parks…the summer traditions surrounding food will still get me out the door. I’ll enjoy it…after all, these tomatoes aren’t going to be as good come October!

Sex is good, but not as good as fresh, sweet corn. ~Garrison Keillor